My Vegan Hippie "Natural Period Products" Review

My Vegan Hippie "Natural Period Products" Review

natural period product review sam shorkey lunette menstrual cup review

CHEERS TO BLEEDING HEARTS (AND CROTCHES!)

Allow me to begin this post by stating that I’m a pretty solid vegan. I do my best to make conscious decisions that do not contribute to the exploitation, death and suffering of our animal friends. But I sheepishly admit (no pun intended) that despite going vegetarian at eight years old and “full vegan” six years ago, there is one area I still turn an ignorant, blind eye to.

And that, my friends, is my period.

riding-the-crimson-wave vegan natural period products review

In my defense, I didn’t even know for the longest time that tampons and maxi pads weren’t vegan-friendly. And perhaps part of me just didn’t want to investigate because I knew deep down (pun intended) that my period is a pretty big deal. And well, I couldn’t exactly do like the pioneers did and bleed into my clothes or stuff bits of parchment or hemp rope up my love tunnel.

Sure, I’d seen menstrual cups sitting atop the shelves at Whole Foods but I’d always think “there’s no way anyone uses these.” Then last year, I watched my homegirl Emily’s YouTube video “Are Tampons Vegan?” and it was a real eye-opener.

Not only did I learn that tampons are bleached cancer tubes laced with toxins and potentially FATAL. But tampons (and pads) also expose us to dioxins (a byproduct from the bleaching process) that cause anything and everything from reproductive and developmental issues to immune system damage, hormonal imbalances and are the slowest degrading paper product of all. And that’s if they even end up in landfills. Sadly, many tampons get flushed down the toilet, leaching all those nasty toxins into the ocean for our marine life friends to deal with (and die from.)

And if this info isn’t scary and depressing enough, add to it the fact that tampons and their toxins are very much tested, injected and vaginally inserted into rabbits and baboons among many other animal species.

Soon after watching Emily’s video, I was determined to no longer participate and start riding the crimson wave using the best possible natural period products that would not interfere with my meatless meathead life or humiliate me when squatting and lunging whilst wearing skin-tight, spandex pants.

I admit, I was scared. I had read this hilarious and horrendous review of the “Diva Cup” and was terrified to try the “menstrual cup” and have a similar experience.

natural period product review vegan hippie period products

Nevertheless, I embraced the opportunity and readied myself for Aunt Flo’s next visit by accumulating all of the best reccommended products (as per my lovely facebook fans’ suggestions) and prepared for the ex-period-ment to commence.

On hand (and soon-to-be crotch) were the following vegan hippie period products:

lunette menstrual cup review natural period products review

A new best friend?! How exciting! My vagina loves making new friends. I’m just not sure how she feels about one that’s made of silicone, has to be bended, folded and twisted up inside of her then fished out with bloody fingers and “emptied” into the toilet and washed off in public places. But according to the website, “Lunette will love me for years” and that’s more than I can say for my vagina’s other friends. So let’s do this! 😉

  • The F-Wrap cloth menstrual pads

I was especially excited to discover these eco-friendly, washable and reusable cloth pads because Karen Stoyles, the owner (and maker) of “Nature Prenatal” products lives in my very own city: Ottawa, Ontario! Bad news for my American readers though ’cause unfortunately the FDA does not allow her to ship ’em to the States. 🙁

You ‘Mericans can, however, purchase a pair of my final selected hippie period product aka:

  • THINX Period Underwear

Yes, period-proof underwear that protect against leaks, odour, bacteria and are actually surprisingly sexy-looking!

Now then, let the vegan hippie ex-period-ment begin!

riding the crimson wave natural menstruation period products review

Day 1 – Aww crap, I just got my period and I’m out in the bush having dinner at my parents’ place. Without any of my new products on hand, I briefly ponder grabbing a tampon out of my purse, but decide to remedy the crime scene with a giant wad of toilet paper instead. And sleep with it in too…

Day 2 – I wake up and spend 10 minutes picking off the bits of TP stuck to my vadge then meditate. In my morning meditation, I proclaim to practice patience and feel excitement for this month’s “menses” as a full-blown vegan hippie and decide that I will never refer to it as “menses” ever again. I then pat myself on the back for meditating because that alone brings my vegan hippie status up to a 7.

After all instructions have been read, I stupidly cut off Lunette’s tip as one of my followers had suggested. I really wish I would’ve actually tested Lunette out for myself before prematurely snipping the tip, but I guess I was just too damn excited (and sick of having toilet paper stuck to my “hot spot.”) As soon as I inserted her (with total ease might I add) I did experience a mild panic attack thinking “okay she’s up there but how am I going to get her out?!”

There wasn’t a string to pull on, and snipping the tip left me with not much to grab onto. Damn it, Shorkey! You have failed already! Guess we’ll just have to hope for the best and worry about this when it’s time to “dump” the cup. Off to the gym I go! And as I put my headphones in, I pray: “please Lunette, please do not fail me on the Stairmaster.”

I wore black pants just in case…

No leakage, no discomfort. Sweet.

After the gym, I came home for a shower and realized this was a perfect opportunity to remove, assess and clean off Lunette. I admit that it was a little difficult to find and grab ahold of what remained of the tip. And I definitely considered cutting my nails shorter for the remainder of this ex-period-ment. But thankfully I managed to fish her out without any issues.

It was, however, kinda weird to see Lunette now chillin’ with Aunt Flo for the first time. But it was also kinda cool in that I suddenly felt more connected to my period than ever before.

“Lunette is helping me to appreciate my power as a woman and the wondrous miracle that is the human body.” This is deep shit, bro. Vegan Hippie Level 9 fo’ sho’!

[bctt tweet=”@LunetteCup makes me vibe with my #FemininePower & the wondrous miracle that is the human body” username=”samanthashorkey”]

Having a shower together is definitely a good time for me and Lunette. And logistically-speaking, a great time for us to ditch Aunt Flo down the toilet. I then give Lunette a nice, little bath under the warm water and then back up into her “safe place” she goes. 🙂

lunette menstrual cup discount code lunette menstrual cup promo code

Day 3 – I can’t believe I didn’t jump on this silicone peach-plug train years ago! Seriously, huge props to my fellow female veegs for getting me onboard and recommending this particular brand of menstrual cup. I LOVE LUNETTE! Wore it all night then rinsed her off in the shower this morning. She’s currently back on the inside and I’m just going about my day feeling like the ultimate no-mess, no-fuss vegan hippie.

I really need to stop talking about it with the guys I’m dating though. Apparently not everyone is as excited to hear about my period as I am. I even wore it tonight whilst teaching my high-impact cardio class and came really close to sharing with everyone there. But I figured talking about my bloody vagina was perhaps something I should keep out of the workplace… for now anyway.

I’m on such a high this menstrual cycle that I was excited to test out the “F Wrap” next. I love that each cloth pad is handmade and every fabric so unique and cute. I almost feel bad spilling “Cousin Red” all over this adorable pattern of bubbly hearts. But alas, I’m ready to ride this cotton pony and HELL YES I’ll take soft flannel pressed up against my nether regions over sticky, unbreathable, bleached synthetic maxi pads ANY DAY! I’m loving the little snap buttons on the wings too. Will report back in the morning on how their “waterproof liner + absorbent bamboo layer” holds up overnight.

Nature Prenatal F wrap cloth reuseable pad

Day 4 – I wake up and as I’m wandering around the apartment, doing my usual morning routine, I can’t help but note that I’m feeling rather “damp” downstairs. It’s not the freshest, most sanitary feeling in the world so for the first time since starting my vegan hippie ex-period-ment, I’m feeling slightly discouraged. I then realize that I’m actually a moron and put the cloth pad on BACKWARDS!

Ugh. Not only did I foolishly snip the tip off of Lunette before actually trying it, I also made the mistake of exposing the cute, heart-patterned side of the “F Wrap” to my bloody crotch rather than the plain, fleece side which of course, contained the waterproof liner and absorbent bamboo layer…

Well, you know what they say about us meatheads… we aren’t always the sharpest tools in the shed. Thankfully, I was smart enough to test out the F-Wrap in the privacy of my own home. And let it be known that once I did wear it correctly, there was no dampness, discomfort, odors and they’re so much more breathable than regular pads.

I’m now about to go train legs at the gym. And with my homegirl Lunette comfortably in tow, I’ve decided to throw on my new THINX “leak-resistant, moisture-wicking, anti-microbial, period-absorbing” thong for panty liner support.

THINX absorbent leak resistant odor absorbing period proof underwear

Yes, I’m in love with them too! What an awesome idea for not only period protection but for sweaty gym sesh protection!

After completing an intense leg workout AND 20 minutes on the stairmaster, I swear these magical undies smell as fresh as a mountain stream and make my butt looks hot as frawk!

Me THINX I now need to invest in many, many more pairs. Me also THINX there are many, many males at my gym who could also greatly benefit from wearing these stink-absorbent wonder-unders (or at least need to wash their gym shorts more often.)

Day 5 – I would normally spend this day wearing a light panty liner but alas, my THINX thong is dirty and I refuse to cheat on the last day of this ex-period-ment with the toxin-laced, animal tested drugstore variety.

I tried wearing one of my “F Wrap” cloth pads but only had ones suitable for a “heavy flow” and were therefore too thick for the gym pants I’m rocking and make me look like I have a giant “deer hoof” between my legs. So to finish my “shark week” exactly as it started, I’m placing a piece of folded TP up there and calling it a “wrap.” (My puns are so on point this post!)

Conclusion: All in all, I really truly LOVED each and every one of these natural period products but I have to admit that one downside to Lunette is that sometimes if I didn’t full-on remove the cup from my love tunnel each and every time after urination, the feeling of needing to pee just wouldn’t go away. And me THINX that’s mostly due to the fact that Lunette fills up with pee when I pee. So be sure to empty her (along with your bladder) at every “pit stop” in order to avoid this feeling.

The washing part (even in public bathrooms) was surprisingly fine and both Lunette and the F-wrap even come with their very own “bags” to hold them in. I am definitely converted and will be using all of these products for the remainder of my reproductive years.

My final recommendations are as follows:

Buying a menstrual cup is well worth the money and not really weird or gross once you get used to it. It’s comfortable (minus the incessant urge to pee if you do not remove and empty it every time you hit the john. It’s also durable, lasts 5 – 10 years apparently and easy to use. And I’m not kidding when I say that it really does connect you that much more to your own body and its’ intricate workings.

I do think it’s wise to invest in reuseable, cloth pads especially for night time or when you’re just chilling at home. They work well for day time too but my suggestion is to wear the thicker ones with loose pants or a skirt to avoid accusations of having a “FUPA.” Or better yet, purchase a mixed bag of cloth pads to accommodate all flows (which Karen does offer.)

And finally, if like me, you’re typically a “commando” fit girl who doesn’t let Aunt Flo keep you outta the gym, I highly recommend that you keep a few THINX thongs in your underwear drawer for those heavier active days when Lunette just isn’t enough or ultra light days when you’d normally resort to a panty liner. In fact, I have since ordered more THINX undies (despite the expensive shipping & duties) because I really love them oh-so-much. 🙂

I hope this vegan hippie ex-period-ment was helpful for you and I’d love to hear your own feedback or suggestions in the comments below on how you ride the crimson wave au natural.

And if you do want to buy your own Lunette cup, please use this link so they know that my hippie period review helped you to find ’em. 🙂

Until next time, vegan fit crew!

-Sam Shorkey, Jacked on the Beanstalk

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16 comments

  • Michelle: November 22, 2016

    Hilarious and informative as always! ❤️ it!!! I’ve been using the Diva Cup for a couple of years and the only complaint is that when I am on day 1 or 2 it doesn’t last me through the night. Might try some of the reusable pads you suggested! I hear some ladies with heave flo use the combo at night. And I shamefully didn’t even realize that tampobs weren’t vegan friendly!! Duh! I originally made the switch because of environmental reasons but will now 1000% be sticking with it due to the cruelty free aspect. And because it rocks. Thanks Sam! You rock!

  • Sam: November 22, 2016

    Awww I love seeing comments like this! THANK YOU, Melissa!!! Sincerely appreciate the support and please let me know what you think of the cup!

  • Melissa: November 22, 2016

    I’ve just spent a good part of my night reading your site and loving all your posts. So glad I discovered you through Bite Sized Vegan. And now I’m finally convinced to go Lunette!

  • Sam: November 21, 2016

    Awesome! Glad you liked it. And I’ll have to order some panty liners soon. Thanks again for everything :)

  • Karen: November 21, 2016

    I love this review Samantha! Thanks for trying my cloth pads. I also do have a wide variety of sizes, including a thin, light absorbency, or pantyliner.

  • Sam: November 20, 2016

    Thanks pal! And you have in-suite laundry so no excuse not to start using some cloth pads :)

  • Jessica: November 20, 2016

    Excellent commentary as usual! Wow, I had no idea tampons and pads were not vegan friendly!

  • Sam: November 19, 2016

    Awesome! Please let me know how it works out for you!

  • Karlena: November 19, 2016

    Thanks for this honest review! You have given me the push I need! Trying this next month!

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  • Sarah Shorkey: November 23, 2016

    Hmmm…I’m intrigued.

  • Sam: November 22, 2016

    Well I’m at least glad to know that I wasn’t the only vegan who was unaware of the cruelty factor behind using tampons. Highly recommend the F-wrap pads for night time and extra protection. Thankfully mine isn’t ever crazy heavy so I didn’t experience any leakage or “overflow” at any point in time. That would definitely suck. Thanks for the comment though. And right back atcha :)

  • Sam: January 04, 2017

    Hahahaha love it.

  • celeste weigel: January 04, 2017

    while I was reading this the song, " I am woman, hear me roar, " came on at work. It was a perfect song while reading this…. I have heard people say that’s they way to go…Thank you for the comical and eye opening experiment. I just might try it now. I bet if I told my husband it will save us money by not buying tampons and pads all the time, he will be all in….lol

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